Misconceptions of A Working Mother {Guest Post}
Today, you will find me talking about my quiet time over at The Straightened Path. However, don’t miss out on today’s post by Danielle from More Than Four Walls. It has been on my heart recently to talk about “The Working Mom.” And so, I have asked Danielle to write about it, since she is, a Mother working outside of her home. Please hear her heart. It will bless you. And, thank you, Danielle, for your time and efforts into this post
Who is the Working Mom?
What are you thinking? Be honest. What does a typically Tuesday look like in your mind for a working mom?
Up at 6:30 for some exercise before her son wakes up at 7. Quick shower while he plays in his room. Then it’s downstairs for breakfast.
She’s got a blue tooth in her ear talking to a client, slipping on her heels while the coffee brews as she shoves a Pop Tart in front of her three year old before whisking him away in his pajamas and uncombed hair to the day care where he’ll remain for 10 hours while she climbs the corporate latter. (Run on sentence intentional.)
At 5pm she picks him up, still on the phone, quick peck on the cheek hello and it’s back to home office where she finishes up reports while he plays alone till Daddy gets home and then they have Chinese takeout that he carried in.
Bath time, bed time. Now time to watch some TV with the husband and do it all again tomorrow.
Is that really the working mom?
Can I challenge you to see it differently?
Let me tell you how my Tuesday goes:
It’s 4:15am. The vibrating alarm goes off under my pillow. “Oh Lord, just one snooze please,” I say silently wanting desperately to lay there against my husband just a few more moments.
But duty calls.
There is a load of laundry to put in the washer, one to hang up and sourdough to mix up for baking in 12 hours.
Check the meal plan, what needs prepped for tonight’s dinner?
Before that is prayer and worship time asking the Lord for strength to continue this journey He has me on and words spoken over the lives of my husband and son. After that comes (hopefully) time to exercise, though most days this doesn’t happen.
All this before I must head out the door to play Business Manager at a job I’m blessed to have but wish I didn’t need at 6:15.
Nine and change later, I’m arriving home to my baby who is all smiles.
I get the biggest hug when I walk in the door.
We play “I want a kiss or I’m going to eat your cheeks” for a few minutes as my mother in-law tells me about the happenings of the day. (Most days she watches him so we don’t need to take him to a sitter or day care.)
Some days he’s napping when I get home but if not we play a bit and he “tells” me about his day. (Oh I wonder what he is trying to say!)
Off goes the “good” sweater and on goes a t-shirt and apron.
The sourdough had 10 hours to rise, that’s good enough for me, so I roll out dough for crackers, while they bake I kneed the dough for English muffins and let them rise.
Oh! Eggs! I need to run down and get the eggs from the chickens. (Almost forgot them, again.) Hat, coat and little work boots so buddy can go with me for eggs. He’s such a helper!
5:30 – time to start dinner (we eat late, hubs doesn’t get home till 6:30.)
Daddy takes care of bath time giving me time to clean up kitchen and finish the English muffins.
A spirited game of Push the Truck, Throw the Ball or Climb the Human Wall (aka Daddy).
Some hugs and kisses and laughing.
Bed time. Since no one can be left out we must gather the lullaby sea house, the teddy bear, the dog and the blanket before we climb on the rocking chair for the reciting of Ten Tiny Puppies and finding Noah in the Jesus Storybook Bible. We sing a song, say a prayer, kiss good night.
It’s 8:30 and I’m tired. But lunches need packed and I would like to sit down with the Hubs for a few minutes. I’ll be in bed by 9….. yep I’m pretty sure I’m not watching Top Chef again tonight. Thank you Lord for DVR’s.
Did you think of that when I said “working mom?”
Probably not but that’s ok.
In fact that’s what I want to discuss.
Why We Work
When I typed that stereotypical “working mom” opening I cried. What I wrote is not a totally outrageous story and it breaks my heart. There are women who put work before their children and thoroughly enjoy their careers over everything including their marriages and their children. They think of children as an addition, an extra, not as their purpose or calling.
We should not judge these women; we should pray for them.
But more so then she, women work outside the home for many other reasons. I’d love to discuss these fully but I fear I could write volumes so here’s a quick peek:
- Second income is necessary for basic survival not lavish living.
- They do not understand the value of being at home raising their children (maybe no one ever lovingly explained it to them…..have you? Have I?)
- They have never entertained the idea of staying at home because it seems out of reach.
- Their mom worked so they work.
- They are honoring their husband who maybe have not caught the vision just yet.
- They are working with the end goal being to stay at home.
As Jesus Does
When you see a working mom, with heels and a pants suit on what do you think? Do you see her as Jesus does? Do you love on her silently asking the Lord to give her strength? Jesus loves her even if her priorities are backward and she cares more about singing karaoke at happy hour then singing good night lullabies. He loves her even when she’s bawling her eyes out at 4:30 am because she has to leave her baby. He loves her as she and her husband put together a financial plan to eliminate debt so she can stay home when it’s time to homeschool.
He loves her at 11:30 pm when she’s finishing up wash and supper dishes because she was homeschooling after she got home from work. He loves on her when she’s working two jobs because being a working mom is better than the abusive relationship. He loves her when she tucks her baby in bed and heads to work at 10:30 pm to work 3rd shift. When you see a working mother give her a smile. Pray for her as she goes by. Sit next to her at church and ask her about her day. Ask her if she would like you to pray throughout the week for her. Get to know her. You never know why she’s working unless you get to know her. Give her a hug. Encourage her. Bless her.
What do you think of as a working mom? How can you help a working mom you know?
Until Next Time,
Be Blessed
Danielle is a wife of one amazing husband, mother of one handsome little boy and daughter of one mighty King. The Lord gave her a promise and desire to be a stay at home mom. Until that day comes she is learning to balance the demands of being a full time working mamma and homemaker while building a Christ-centered home. Read more at More Than Four Walls.
Some if us work because we love our job and feel we are doing important work for God there, as well. (I am a teacher)
Katy,
You bring up a good point that I did not mention. Thank you for sharing.
Great post.
When I started to read your post, I was all set to be offended. As I read on I totally relate. Aren’t in-laws and parents who care for our children such a blessing? I cry almost every time I have to go to work and my children are begging me not to(I work 3 12s a week, so I am home more than some). I have prayed so often for God to allow me to stay home or at least work part-time. He keeps telling me to wait. It is hard for me to accept that sometimes. Still I am thankful that He has allowed a way for me to be able to homeschool. Thank you for the encouragement.
I’m glad you were encouraged instead of offended.
I think what Danielle has to say on this topic is wonderful!
Ri,
Yes, in-law and parents are a God-send for sure. I truly do not know how I would handle sending him to day care. I know there are quality day cares I just don’t know if I (me) could handle him being with people I didn’t personally know. God bless the women who do that. They are strong then I.
I appreciate you reading though the post and for your comment.
What a terrific post! I love the “silently loving on them” by praying concept!!! I could totally relate to your day and you expressed it so well! There are MANY reasons why mothers find themselves working outside the home, as each family is unique. A mother whose heart is in the home while her body is in the workplace is a precious soul who needs tender prayer! Thank you for a fresh perspective!